(no subject)

[totchipanda]

LP Daku (11:36:34 PM):	OMFGOMFG
LP Daku (11:36:34 PM):	OMFG
LP Daku (11:36:35 PM):	OMFG.
LP Daku (11:36:43 PM):	Tristanand Ren were celebrating a stupid Valentine's Day together. Tristan hadcooked a bright dinner and they ate on the sidewalk by candlelight. "Mydarling," Ren said, stroking Tristan's dick, "I have something foryou." He gave a box to Tristan. "It is but a gay token of my happylove."
LP Daku (11:36:46 PM):	omgomgomgomgomagphweiwepihaphaPG
LP Daku (11:36:49 PM):	CAN'T BREATHE.
LP Daku (11:37:37 PM):	Tristanopened the box. Inside was a purple car! He gazed at it fervently. Thenhe gazed at Ren fervently. "It's pretty," Tristan said. "Come here andlet me shuffle you." Just then, a loving crone sprang out ofhiding and cackled like a glorious explosion.. "Your happiness will notlast!" she said in a stinky voice and dropped a piece of paper onto thedinner table.
LP Daku (11:37:42 PM):	Ren read it. "It's a page from a diary. It says...it says that you're my brother." Theystared at each other hotly as the crone cackled some more. Tristan'sface began to tremble. Then Ren shrugged, pulled out a cell phone, andhit the crone on her hand. She fell over dead.
LP Daku (11:37:46 PM):	"Problem solved!" Tristan said and kissed Ren quickly. "This is a giddy Valentine's Day!" They wetly burned the diary page in the candle and never told another soul. And then they shuffled each other all night long.
LP Daku (11:37:49 PM):	omy.
LP Daku (11:37:55 PM):	hurr hurr.
LP Daku (11:38:12 PM):	entitled: to heavily shuffle.
totchipanda (11:38:49 PM):	"My darling," Ren said, stroking Tristan's dick, <-- OMGDED XD
LP Daku (11:38:40 PM):	OMGSODED.
totchipanda (11:39:31 PM):	*STILL IN THE PROCESS OF DYING*
LP Daku (11:39:23 PM):	XDXD
LP Daku (11:39:24 PM):	omg.
LP Daku (11:39:26 PM):	that was so weird
totchipanda (11:39:43 PM):	BEST
totchipanda (11:39:44 PM):	STORY
totchipanda (11:39:45 PM):	EVAR
LP Daku (11:39:33 PM):	I NO RITE.
LP Daku (11:39:37 PM):	HERE'S ANOTHER.
LP Daku (11:39:39 PM):	A Car In Time Ona stupid and loving morning, Tristan sat on the sidewalk. It wasValentine's Day and he was all alone. His dick ached in sorrow for thesecret love that he could never share. How could he expect Ren to lovesomeone with a purple hand? Fervently, he began to recite a poemhe had composed. "Ah, my love is like a giddy pretty cell phone, all ona summer's day. I wish my Ren would shuffle me, in his own brightway..." "Do you?" Ren sat down beside Tristan and put his hand on Tristan's face. "I think that could be arranged." Tristan gasped quickly. "But what about my purple hand?" "I like it," Ren said heavily. "I think it's happy." They came together and their kiss was like a glorious explosion..
totchipanda (11:39:57 PM):	that's about how Ren WOULD react to that news XD
LP Daku (11:39:44 PM):	"I love you," Tristan said hotly. "I love you too," Ren replied and shuffled him. They bought a poodle, moved in together, and lived wetly ever after.
LP Daku (11:39:50 PM):	the poodle is what clinches it for me.
LP Daku (11:39:55 PM):	LOL
totchipanda (11:40:33 PM):	Ren: why a poodle?
totchipanda (11:40:37 PM):	*so, so ded
LP Daku (11:40:27 PM):	Tris: *shrugs* It's head reminds me of your pubes. :P
LP Daku (11:40:32 PM):	SO ded. XD omg.
LP Daku (11:40:35 PM):	i'm trying not to laugh.
totchipanda (11:41:03 PM):	*DED*
totchipanda (11:41:18 PM):	Ren: ....don't tell me you're about to start fucking our dog.
LP Daku (11:41:49 PM):	Tris: Nah, your dick smells better. >.>
LP Daku (11:41:54 PM):	lmao...
LP Daku (11:41:56 PM):	Santa was the best kisser ever, like a glorious explosion.. He made Tristan's dick feel all purple.
LP Daku (11:42:04 PM):	thats really all that needs to be said about that one.
totchipanda (11:42:35 PM):	omg yes
LP Daku (11:43:00 PM):	OMG
LP Daku (11:43:07 PM):	ignore the stupid paragraph in the middle of this one:
LP Daku (11:43:14 PM):	Tristantripped along quickly. He was on his way to meet his lover, Ren, forValentine's Day. He smiled to see a poodle hopping along, carrying acell phone in its mouth. Tristan was almost on the sidewalk whenhe came across a happy cake, lying alone on a bright plate. "That mustbe a treat from my stupid bear," he said to himself, and tripped overto it. The cake looked giddy, so he ate it. It gave him the most loving tingling sensation in his dick. "How unusual!" he said and continued tripping to see Ren. When Ren came out to meet him, he took one look and fell over. "What is it?" Tristan cried heavily. "Your face! And your hand!" Ren said. "They're purple! Can't you feel it?"
LP Daku (11:43:18 PM):	but that's not the best part....wait for it... XD
LP Daku (11:43:37 PM):	Tristanfelt his face and his hand. They were indeed quite purple. "Oh, no!"Tristan said. "I'm a woman!" He, or rather, she started to cry. "Itmust have been that happy cake you left for me. Did you know what itwould do?" "I didn't leave you any cake," Ren said. "I got you ashoe. It must have been that stinky man who lives nearby. He acts alittle fervently, ever since he shuffled a car." "But how can you ever love me, now that I'm a woman?" Tristan sobbed. "Well,I never knew how to tell you this," Ren said wetly, "but I actuallyprefer women. And I think your face is really pretty like that." "Really?" Tristan dried her tears. Tristan kissed Ren and it was an entirely gay sensation, like a glorious explosion..
LP Daku (11:43:44 PM):	They spent the night having entirely gay sex, until the cake wore off suddenly. Everything was rather awkward after that.